Download the talk of Fabienne here : talk-in-Asia
« My illumination of conscience »
National Congress on Divine Mercy in Asia
October 7 – 9 th 2016
(28 dioceses attended this event)
Beloved brothers and sisters, I come today to witness that Christ resurrected me.
Since many years I have given talks in 6 continents.
My parents had me baptized a few days after my birth.
I followed all the catechism classes and I made my first Communion.
Then I no longer attended the Catholic Church until 1996, the date on which Jesus came to save me. I was 32 years old which is 20 years ago.
Now, I will tell you a little about the life that I led during those years, far from Our Lord Jesus-Christ.
As soon as the age of 15, my life took a reversal.
I began to follow horoscope, palm reading, esoteric meditation, Past-Life Regression, magnetism, New Age healers, positive thinking, belief in UFO’s and extraterrestrials, New Age breathing, aura reading, numerology, Astrology, Yoga, palm reading, fortune telling and the psychics, other occult practices, telepathy, pendulum, all kinds of white magic, hypnosis, all forms of healing through energies, crystals, music and colours, meditations on New Age music and reiki which the bishops of the USA warned against. Reiki is power of the devil.
When I finished my school studies, I spent my weekends in discos, smoking hashish, drinking alcohol.
Sometime later I went to a spiritual center to listen to the teachings of a guru.
One day the guru proposed to experience spiritism and, innocent as I was, I accepted !
And there, I began to meet with mediums who would go into trance, who received supposed messages from the saints.
Had I known that it was fallen spirits who were delivering these messages, I would have immediately left the spiritual center.
I believed in it and also believed in karma and reincarnation.
I believed that my soul, upon the death of my body come back to earth in another body.
I believed that this process of moving from body to body could continue repeatedly until my soul got sufficiently “purified” and eventually freed from bodily life.
One day the guru proposed to free me from my so called past lives. He proposed me to make a great cleansing of my soul.
Satan has put into my brain visions of my so called previous lives.
In the visions I saw that I was such a woman in one life and another person in another life and that is why I did believed in reincarnation.
I did not know that Satan deceived me.
The guru laid his hands on 2 of my chakras : the chakra of the heart and the chakra of the third eye and channelled the powers he had acquired from the demon.
Then he told me he has transmitted light to me, but unfortunately it was Lucifer light, God’s ennemy.
Then the kundalini arose and Lucifer entered into me and lead me from my interior. Kundalini is the power of the serpent, Satan.
In the spirit center I have also practised yoga. Even the simple exercices of yoga have opened my chakras and evil spiritual entities entered into me and destroyed my interior.
I did not know that yoga is a Hindu practise linked to Brahmam, the hindu concept of God.
In Hindouism there are thousands of Gods. I learnt this when I was evangelizing in Catholic churches in India.
I then realised that I was worshipping a false God and consequently I was breaking God’s first commandment :
YOU SHALL NOT HAVE GODS OTHER THAN ME.
Feeling more and more sick I decided to abandon these techniques but since I had opened myself to the chakras. I was between life and death for long months.
I also affiliated with the Order of Rosicrucians AMORC.
It is an esoteric order that is not of God.
In this Order I studied different things such as the psychic body of man, astral trips, human aura, vocal sounds, mantras…
Then I experienced that satan had placed his energy within me with his power and I began to tremble.
In my new age studies I was told that Jesus is not God but a simple master and an avatar.
I then realized that I betrayed Jesus with new age teachings as they are not compatible with catholic doctrine.
I was worshipping the cosmic and the énergies instead of worshipping Jesus who is the son of God, the second person of the Trinity.
A fews weeks later, I met a man in the Rosicrucian Order, who had been single for many years as his wife had left him for another man.
They were married in the Catholic church 14 years ago.
We begin to live together common law without knowing that it was adultery which is a mortal sin and that our souls were uniting with impure spirits.
Then came a blast of grace !
While meditating in my bed I saw Jesus face and He told me : My name is YESHOUAH.
Later on while looking at a poster of the Sacred heart of Jesus, I heard His voice that said to me : « My holy wounds will save you » ! The wounds of His sorrowful Passion.
Then the blessed virgen Mary told me : MY SON DIED BECAUSE OF YOUR SINS.
At that moment, I realized that I was a great sinner.
As I was studying New Age, I thought I could save myself through succesive lives. I thought I was God myself, I though I was a highly enlightened being and I did not believed in sin.
Then the blessed Virgen told me : My dear child, lend me your nothing, Give me everything, I love you. I am your Mother and I want to bring you to Paradise. Devote your thoughts, your actions, your day to Me I will take you in My arms and console you. Promise Me to always think about Me by saying my Holy Rosary. Do not forget Me. I love you so much.
A week later I was called to make a pilgrimage to Medjugorje. Upon arrival in Medjugorje I accepted to be reinstated in the Catholic Church. Here I was, so little, bearing my great misery before the Blessed Sacrament that was exposed, the real presence of the living Jesus, body, blood, soul and divinity.
After practising the stations of the cross the blessed Virgin Mary told me that the Rosicrucian Order is a sect.
Before leaving Medjugorje, I began to cry and cry and my eyes were burning. The blessed Virgin Mary gave me so many graces to repent from my sinful life.
Upon my return to France, God gave me a supernatural experience in the midst of which He asked me to do penance because my soul was condemned, completely lost.
He showed me my soul enclosed inside the Beast that had the head of a Lion as described in the Apocalypse.
I saw the demons that surrounded me and were ready to take me with them to the place of darkness.
These demons were linked to each of my sins.
I was chained to Lucifer. I saw the black chains with which Satan was binding me. They were large black chains. I also saw the devil with a pitchfork. He was all black, with a very mean look. The chains that I saw were all the sins that I had committed and that kept me linked to various demons of hell’s hierarchy.
Only Jesus with his Precious Blood could cut these chains during my confession to a priest.
Then Jesus told me with great charity :
« You are mine».
« I have created you with my hands »
«Think only of Me».
«Think of loving only Me».
« I will heal you».
«You bathe in my Blood».
«Give Me much love and Sin no more».
«No longer sell your soul to the devil».
«No longer Betray me».
«I am your only master».
«I am the Way, the Truth and the Life».
«No longer remain far from Me».
«Elude the world».
« Elude men »
« I want you to be closer to me. »
« You are my joy. »
« I am the son of God. »
Then God gave me a great illumination of my conscience.
When I began to reflect deeply into my soul, I saw myself as a hyena like Judas.
I descended into the abyss, into the crater of fire, while blaspheming and feeling hatred towards God, just like the damned. It was horrible.
I truly lived great sufferings in my soul.
That is what all the damned experience for all eternity. They suffer for each sin they have committed with their senses.
Then I heard Satan. In his fury He told me: “I condemned you to the punishment of hell” and he added : « I will make you mine ».
I saw the black tentacles of the Beast. It was like a giant squid or an octapus that kept me tied up.
The worst part is that I could hear my soul saying : I am at the bottom of the abyss, I am God, Satan, I love you!” It was truly horrible! I was a rotting demon !
The day when Jesus told me: « You worship Satan », I did not believe him. Now, I was facing the fact. My soul adored evil.
Then I was told that the Guru who opened my chakras died.
Upon his death, The guru descended to this place of darkness. His soul was lost for eternity, because he had freely refused Jesus. He freely wanted to remain in his spiritual pride. He was a man who was deeply initiated into esoterism, shamanism, rosicrucians and yoga and many occult practises.
He did not regret his faults.
He did not want to confess his sins to a priest.
Therefore, because of his pride, God abandoned him.
God told me that He loves little souls, humble souls.
In another mystical experience, my soul found itself with both hands hanging on a wall.
I saw that my soul had the same shape as that of my earthly body.
I was in what seemed to be a huge grotto.
Everything was dark.
Suddenly great waves of brilliant light descended into the place where I was.
Above me, was purgatory, with very high flames.
The souls that were in this state of purification were all united to the Divine Will.
Their greatest suffering is to not yet see God face to face.
They saw Him, on their particular judgment, in a light that is not yet that of heaven and have therefore kept a great yearning for God, but they do not wish to appear before Him with their blemishes.
They are being purified and they make amends for that for which they did not make amends for on the earth and many of them learn how to love.
I do not speak to them because God does not allow it.
Then I saw many white steps that my soul quickly climbed and upon arriving at the top of the white staircase, a man dressed in red opened a door and then removed himself quickly.
Behind the door of heaven, there is the city of light, the new Jerusalem, a heavenly city described in the book of Revelation in the Bible.
According to St John, the New Jerusalem is « pure gold, like clear glass » and its « brilliance is like a very costly stone, as a stone of crystal-clear jasper.» The street of the city is also made of « pure gold, like transparent glass ».
The base of the city is laid out in a square and surrounded by a wall made of jasper.
God and the Lamb are the city’s temple, since they are worshiped everywhere.
The book of Revelation goes on to describe a river of the water of life that flows down the middle of the great street of the city from the Throne of God.
The tree of life grows in the middle of the street and on either side of the river. The tree bears twelve fruits, or kinds of fruits, and yields its fruit every month.
St John states that the New Jerusalem will be free of sin.
The name of God will be on the servants of God’s foreheads.
Night will no longer fall, and the inhabitants of the city will « have need no lamp nor light of the sun, for the Lord God gives them light. » and they shall reign forever and ever. »
St John said that there are twelve gates in the wall oriented to the compass with three each on the east, north, south, and west sides.
There is an angel at each gate. These gates are each made of a single pearl, giving them the name of the « pearly gates ».
The names of the twelve tribes of Israel are written on these gates.
To enter the city of light, the new Jerusalem, everyone has to be washed in the blood of the Lamb through the sacrement of confession with a priest.
Sinners do not enter the city of light with a single sin.
Remember that Catechism of Catholic Church says that when you die in mortal sin (like adultery for example), your soul fall directly into hell.
Sexual relations are only permitted by God to procreate in the sacrament of marriage. Outside the sacrament of marriage this is a sin.
So you see how much it is important to go to confession to a priest.
Dear brother and sisters, I heard God’s voice
«I am a Father full of love for my children»,
« Accept my love »
« Do not be afraid of my love »
« My love is in you ».
God thinks only of healing us and nursing our wounds.
He is composed of 3 attributes : love, mercy and justice. Mercy is His greatest attribute.
I then saw Jesus in heaven surrounded by a beautiful golden light.
He was Majestic with a crown on his head. He was so beautiful and powerful.
My soul felt great peace and a great desire to come to Him.
I would have liked to remain near the Son of God, It felt so good.
The love who was in the heart of Jesus was so so strong that it consumed me and I began to fill his great tenderness and I said to Jesus : My Lord I do not want to loose your love any more.
I also saw beautiful pure white angels and my gardian angel. He was very tall.
Then I saw my grandmother.
She was very peaceful and very bright in appearance.
She looked like someone who was 30 years old.
The light of God was shining upon her soul.
When I was looking at my grandmother’s face, I could realize how much she is happy in heaven. She died of cancer, but in heaven she was healthy.
Then some saints spoke to me.
I heard a voice who told me : the one who goes to hell is the one who denies and betrays Jesus.
At that moment, I understood how much it is important to be faifhful to God’s 10 commandments.
- I am the LORD your God. You shall worship the Lord your God and Him only shall you serve.
- You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain.
- Remember to keep holy the Sabbath day.
- Honor your father and your mother.
- You shall not kill.
- You shall not commit adultery.
- You shall not steal.
- You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
- You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife.
- You shall not covet your neighbor’s goods.
Then, with the eyes of God I had a particular judgment which made me suffer much.
God opened my interior and had me see : all my thoughts that were not in his Love, all my participation with evil, all my ill feelings, my hatred, my angers, the deadly consequences of unforgiveness, my criticisms and judgments of others.
God told me :
« I know all your thoughts »
« Beware of judging others »
» Do not accuse them »
« Love them all ».
When I came back to my senses, God took me with his power in his divine heart to rest and he told me that the state of my soul when I was in hell was the consequence of my disobediences towards His law.
Later on with the man I met we decided to get a civil wedding.
The blessed Virgin Mary told me that I was not allowed to marry a divorced man who was already married in the church, but I disobeyed her.
We were not able to get married in the Catholic Church because he had previously a sacrament of marriage.
Two days after the wedding while I was praying in my bed Jesus with his great power took me in another bedroom and He told me : Obey me, I ask for reparation of your sin”
Then He showed me cruel eyed demons to whom I was bound because of my sin of adultery.
What horror !
As I wanted children, Jesus then explained to me that His law does not permit to procreate outside the sacrament of marriage and He told me : It is forbidden to procreate.
After that, I decided to go and see a priest.
The priest told me that if my husband and I live in chastity in 2 separate rooms, I could take holy communion and have confession.
But if I did not live in chastity, I could not have the sacraments.
And recently, I asked again priests and many of them told me that people living together common law, without the sacrament of mariage, cannot take holy communion and the other sacraments, as long as they do not live as brother and sister in chastity.
And the priests added that if people who live in mortal sin take holy communion, their communion will bring condamnation upon their soul.
And the priests told me at the end that people who want to take holy communion must be in the state of grace and repent first from all their sins.
The priests explained to me that divorce does not dissolve church marriage and that my husband remained married before his lawful wife till death do them part even if she remarried another man.
The Word of God tells us : « What God has bound, man cannot separate ». God hates divorce and He told me after the Synod of the family that He does not agree that people who live in mortal sin take holy communion. In other words, people who live in concubinage or people who are divorced and remarried should not take the sacraments as long as they do not live as brother and sister.
Then I came back home and God told me : «Listen to my word, observe my commandments, observe the Sabbath». (That is to say the day of the Lord).
Usually on Sundays I did not go to mass and I was practising sport, doing the garden or doing my housework. I was totally wrong.
As for the commandments of God, I knew that there were ten but knew no more. Then I purchased a Bible and I learned about the Law of God.
I also took the Catechism of Catholic Church and I discovered that since the age of 15 I have been living in the state of mortal sin. I was spiritually dead.
My soul was condemned and Jesus told me : Your soul was lost.
I can tell you that I am grateful to God that He came to save me.
Jesus came on earth to redeem the poor sinners like me.
Then Jesus told me : Defend my law that is to say Defend my 10 commandments.
After that, I spoke to my husband and explained to him we have to live in chastity.
Then I heard a voice who told me twice ; You will have peace after many masses will be celebrated for your soul.
So I asked a priest to celebrate many masses for my poor soul and during the celebration of the masses, I was suffering and lying on the ground and the blessed Virgen Mary told me : Go and take the sacraments. I will free you from all these evil spirits and I can tell you that she freed me while praying the rosary.
Jesus added : The rosary will save you and when I prayed the rosary, Jesus told me : I pray for your liberation.
Jesus is a good father. I call him Dad. He is my best friend.
During the celebration of the masses Holy Spirit would awaken my conscience to all the sins I have committed from my childhood up to my present.
So I noted all those sins on many sheets of paper.
After the celebration of numerous masses I asked a priest to celebrate the sacrament of the anointing of the sick.
I had more than 10 times this sacrament because I was between life and death because of my opening to chakras, yoga, reiki and kundalini which are all demonic powers.
The Hate of Satan has entered into me with these practises.
Then a priest prayed over my esoteric studies prayers of exorcism.
Then Jesus told me : Recognize your faults.
So I decided to go and see a priest but the devil was furious and he told me Go to hell.
He was furious because he knew that Jesus was going to save my poor soul with the sacrament of confession.
Then when I rushed to the church, the devil pursued me saying : you are forgiven, you are forgiven.
But I knew very well that if I confessed directly to God without going through the priest I could never enter heaven and I know that if I did not enter the confessional I would not be freed of my sins by the Church, the only one that has this power.
Jesus has founded His church on Peter who was the first Pope of the Catholic Church.
So I held firm and Satan left me.
I entered the confessional and I confessed everything that I spoke to you about previously (night clubs, fornication, civil marriage with a divorced man from catholic church, adultery, living common law, alcohol, drugs, tobacco, belief in reincarnation, rosicrucians spiritualism, astrology, numerology, card reading, the tarots, New Age….)
and I added : I always disobeyed my parents and my bosses at work, I took the pill and used different means of contraception, I wore mini-skirts which encouraged men to sin in their gaze; I sinned by impure and uncharitable words and thoughts, I did not attend mass on Sundays and days of obligation, I did not do Lenten practices properly for years, I encouraged people to live common law, I led a friend to a clinic for an abortion, I did not pray and I did not share with the poor, I had many idols in music and cinema and artists, I saw X-rated films, scary films, films of violence, I read evil books that did not lead to the sanctification of my soul, I also added the capital sins I committed : pride, greed, envy, anger, lust, gluttony, sloth.
The priest listened to me with patience and charity and since then I have been going to confession regularly.
I then went before the tabernacle for my penance and there Jesus told me with all his fatherly love : Your sins are erased.
What a grace dear brothers and sisters.
After my confession and my sincere repentance, Jesus told me : You have my mercy.
Before receiving the mercy of God, I was in hell.
Then Jesus encouraged me to pray a lot and one day he told me at 3 PM, the hour of mercy :
Implore my mercy on the souls, Pray to me through My Passion.
You know I suffered a lot because many of my friends and family members were far from the church.
So Jesus told me : Never cease praying to me for them.
At the time of death, God will take all my prayers, all my sacrifices I have done to save the souls of my family and the other souls.
As long as I pray for souls, God saves them.
But God demands from me to live in the state of grace to answer my prayers.
You probably remember that Our Lady of Fatima said that souls go to hell because nobody pray for them.
So God gives us an important mission of prayer to save all the souls who are lost.
I began to recite every day the chaplet of divine mercy.
I also was encouraged by heaven to pray the act of love he dictated to sister consolata Betrone : JESUS MARY I LOVE YOU SAVE SOULS.
Jesus said to Sister consolata that a perfect act of love JESUS MARY I LOVE YOU SAVE SOULS involves the eternal salvation of a soul.
This means that each time we say JESUS MARY I LOVE YOU SAVE SOULS, Jesus saves one soul.
It can be a soul of a dying, a soul of a sinner, a soul in purgatory….
So I began to pray every day hundreds of JESUS MARY I LOVE YOU SAVE SOULS.
Dear Brothers and sisters, after my confession I came back home.
I was really Convinced that I was on a wrong path and I began to tear to pieces all the Rosicrucian books, all the books on numerology, palm reading, tarot cards, books on spiritism, and the books on New Age or even the books about occult sciences.
I got rid of them beacause as long as those books were at my place, the devils lived there as well.
Then I asked a priest to bless the house and when the Blessed Virgin was enthroned in the home, calm returned home.
Dear brothers and sisters, after 2 years living like brothers and sisters with my husband I divorced.
Then Jesus asked me to serve him in the world and testify His Mercy in the World.
Let us trust and tell Jesus: « Jesus, I trust in you ».
If God healed me, therefore then everybody can be saved.
No sin will exhaust the great mercy of God and the more we seek it, the more it increases.
The greater the sinner, the more he has a right to the mercy of God.
He who refuses to pass through the door of God s mercy must pass through the door of God s justice…
Jesus told me : Purgatory is God’s mercy and Hell God’s justice.
So I understood that many souls are lost.
So I told God : Is it you Jesus who condemned these souls ? and He answered : The souls condemned themselves.
Dear brothers and sisters, the souls who are in hell are lost because at the hour of their death they could not look at Jesus in the eyes, They could not bear Jesus light and they condemned themselves to the place of darkness for all eternity.
If they had repented and confessed their sins to a priest during their earthly life, if they have prayed and made apostolate, they could be in heaven or purgatory.
The mercy of God only reaches those who repent with firm purpose of amendment.
This is a condition to receive God’s mercy.
Dear brothers and sisters, you and I will, at the hour of our death, appear before God for our particular judgment and we all will see the film of all our life with every sin we have committed.
At that moment we will not be able to say to God that we did not sin, because all our sins are recorded during our earthly life and will appear before the eyes of our soul in front of Jesus who will be at that moment a merciful saviour or a just Judge.
Dear brothers and sisters, if we have a single mortal sin unconfessed, we will not enter Paradise.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church clearly states that the souls of those who die in mortal sin like adultery for example descend immediately after death into hell, where they suffer the punishments of hell, « eternal fire ».
Dear brothers and sisters Are you ready to meet God ?
I can tell you that I am not ready because I did not help Jesus to save enough souls with prayers, testimony, fasting and apostolate.
Praised be Jésus-Christ and be a thousand times blessed.